My reality

Before I get started on my month long challenge, I need to get a few things straight.  In the end, I am about ease and convenience.  I want to challenge myself to get my grocery bill down to $100 a week, but that does not mean that I want to drive all over town looking for the best prices, clip coupons, or change the way I eat.  I know!  My BFF from Ecuador texted me the other day with "$100?! hahahahahahahahahahaha!"  She knows me quite well and knows that above all else I tend to be a bit of a foodie with a splash of laziness.
When I was on the playground the other day with Fara, I was talking food with some of the other parents.  I mentioned that I make a loaf of bread almost everyday and there is very little processed food being consumed in my house.  One mother said to me, "That's great! If you have the time to do it, you totally should.  I wish I had that kind of time."  I simply told her it didn't take anymore time than running to the store and left it at that.
But when I got home, I reflected on the comment and then I got a little irritated.  Time!?  That is one freaking luxury that I don't have!  And then, I know this is really wrong, but I started to judge this woman rather harshly.  She had one child at home.  No job outside the home and a man who is home by 6pm.  Now, those of us with 2 or more children consider....well....I will just say it.....one child is a hobby.  Don't get me wrong.  Raising one child is hard in itself and sometimes more difficult because all the entertainment falls to you.  But you are never outnumbered and there is something to be said about that. Now if you have a partner with that one child, that means that you can actually go to the grocery store by yourself, or god forbid, happy hour with adults once in while.
However, I digress and back to the topic at hand.  I realized that this woman and many others out there may not realize what my life is really like.  Maybe she thinks that I have all this time in the world and that my children are little angels who do their chores and homework the first time they are told. They do their chores and their homework, but it doesn't mean that it occurred without an exhausting fight.  Maybe she thinks that my super handsome husband is actually in the house or the damn state for that matter to be of help. Maybe she just wants to make up excuses about why she can't do the things she wants to.  What it really boils down to, is what is important to her to make time for.
I am attempting to spend only $100 a week on groceries beginning in April.  I am blogging my experience, because that is what we as a society generally do now and we actually think anybody else will care. Just so that no one will think that I have an upper hand and all the right circumstances to make this work, I want to explain my life a little bit.  If I am successful (which to be honest, I have my doubts) I want others to think, well if she can do it in her crazy and insane life with her crazy and insane mind, maybe I can too. Basically, I would like to strip away mine and everybody else's excuses.  We make time for what is important to us.  The other stuff, we usually just make up excuses.  And that is okay.  We can't do everything all of the time.  Sometimes we have to prioritize and let some things go.  We may not like it, but life is busy and life is crazy, and sometimes, life is limiting.
Many of you know, because I am pretty vocal and bitter about it at times, that my husband travels.....a lot.  I would say that he is gone about 90% of the time.  And when he is in town, he leaves at 6:30am and is never home before 7:30pm.  He works hard and I feel too much, but that is a topic for another one of my diatribes. So, what that means is that I am with the kids 24/7.  My oldest two, Zoe 10, and Selah 7, are both in school during the day.  Fara, the 3 year old is in preschool 2 days a week for 3 hours.  I work on Thursdays so the only time I really have to myself is on Tuesday which is usually spent running errands.  I teach 3 spin classes a week and often sub for other instructors.  The housework, the child rearing, the being part of a community are all on my shoulders. Then of course, being the maniac I am, I decided to start my own business, Blackett Body Basics.  Might I add, it is pretty fresh! Check it out!  www.blackettbodybasics.com  Oh and we can't forget the Half Iron Man in August that I signed up for when I got drunk on my 40th and decided that there was no way in hell that I was going to get old!
My life is crazy.  It is often overwhelming!  And sometimes it sucks.  I do not do the "stay at home" part of stay at home mom very well.  I do love my kids.  I know that I am lucky to be able to stay home with them.  But that does not mean that it is always honky dory, especially doing it all by myself.  I get tired and miss the days when my husband used to walk through the door at night and take over.
My main objective wasn't to bitch and moan about my life.  It is actually pretty rad, but I am human and I live a real life, so not everything is perfect.  That is just what life is.  What I am trying to say is that I am a normal person with a basically normal, hectic schedule and a normal inclination to cut corners to make things easier, on a mission to cut my grocery bill in half.   Also, if I do cut the grocery budget down, I can spend more money (without the usual arguments) in Puerto Rico in 2 weeks, when I tag along with the husband on a business trips.  His job does have some perks for me, like frequent flier miles and the occasional tropical destination.
So the real motivation behind me cutting the grocery budget down is revealed and I am thinking I may take a surfing lesson.

$100 a week grocery bill

Okay, my husband and I fight all the time over money.  We have very different approaches to creating and maintaining a budget.  We also have very different ideas about what is the most important thing to spend our money on.  We come  from the complete opposite ends of the spectrum when it comes to our concepts of money.  For him, I believe, spending money is actually physically painful.  I read an article once in the NY Times about the difference between cheap skates and the rest of us.  To cheap skates spending money releases a chemical in the brain that actually makes it painful for them.  They can't help it.  It is part of their physiology.  Now, I am exaggerating a wee bit.  My husband just feels that it is VERY important not to be in debt and to have 3 months pay saved up in the bank.  I think that is a great idea and theoretically I agree.  However, I like to LIVE while I live.  To me, while it is important to stay within your means, money is money.  It comes.  It goes.  But it is never worth the heartache we allow it to cause.  See now the formula for some knock down, drag out fights on the money front.
Through our almost 8 years of marriage, we have both floated a little more towards the middle.  I realize that because of my husband, I will most likely have a retirement.  And I try to tell him, that because of me, he should have some sweet ass memories to think back on.  He quite hasn't seen that point yet.  Go figure!  Just to give an idea about how different we are I will tell you about our grocery battle when we first got married.
Selah was 2 months old.  Zoe was 2 years old.  And Robert had just found out that he had been let go of his teaching job (the circumstances of which I will delve into later because it is a sinister tale of deceit, betrayal, and the untimely death of the boss....okay the last part is not true, but I did wish it for awhile).  He had found a job that he was supposed to be making good money at in sales, but ended up only making $1300 a month.  We had some money in the bank, but that didn't matter to Robert.  He said that needed to be saved for an emergency.  In my head I was thinking, isn't this the emergency?  So he gave me a budget of $100 a week for groceries and that was to include diapers, toilet paper, and other household products.  OMG!   Okay is anyone else there thinking what I was thinking?  WTH!?  So needless to say, I ignored the budget.
So thus our first arguments over money started.  Being sleep deprived, I suggested that he take over the grocery shopping.  ummmm...yeah.  My man came home with the biggest can of beans I had ever seen and a huge bag of rice.  I laughed so hard until I realized that he was dead serious and that is what he expected us to eat for the week. I was and am still very adamant about fresh fruits and vegies being plentiful in our house.  Can you see where this might cause a conflict of interest?
It is now 8 years later and we are still having the same argument. I keep thinking that the fact that I am a good cook and hook him up on a daily basis should sink in at some point, but then I remember the research and that he can't help it.  I have gotten a little bit more sophisticated and I make our bread and have very little processed food in our house.  I am venturing out and trying making homemade yogurt.  It is right now, at this moment, incubating and I will let you know how it turns out. I am seeing how making things from scratch is not only better for you and tastes better, but is a lot cheaper.  So now that he has chilled out ......a little...about the grocery bill (mainly because I am staying in a reasonable budget) I have decided to challenge myself and see if I can feed my family food that is nourishing for both the body and soul for $100 a week.  I will blog about it and let you know how it is going.
ps  I just made a flaxseed sunflower seed bread that is pretty awesome.  I will post the recipe later.
xoxox